Iíve gotten myself into quite a situation here. How do I write an article about ďthings women do that annoy their partnersĒ without getting in trouble with my wife? Well, Iíll tell you how: Iím going to play it safe.
This is one of those topics that youíll occasionally see written on websites or in magazines, intended to be used as a rallying cry for other guys. ďThis is why women are so annoying!Ē But since Iím writing this for the opposite gender, Iím going to throw out a few of the more honest, and general examples, and give you an idea of why it might irritate the man in your life.
Ladies, you can call it nesting or decorating, or whatever you want, but thereís a point where we just stop caring. At first, itís exciting to be picking out fabrics and paint colors as a couple, but eventually you man will reach his limit. For me, it was when the number of extraneous throw pillows in our apartment reached critical mass, leaving few precious spots to sit or lie down without disturbing up the carefully managed furniture pillow ecosystem. The excitement wears off for most men when they realize that while theyíre expected to be part of the home decorating decisions, they arenít making any actual decision. Giving a man a choice between a red flower throw pillow and a green flower throw pillow isnít much of a choice if we donít want flowers all over the place. Weíre just helping you narrow down the things that you like. Itís not that we donít care. I think there just comes a point where we donít care as much.
Of course, this is where problems typically arise. Men look at the home objects at their base level. Your partner looks at that same pillow in a completely different way. To me, itís just a pillow. To my wife itís the pillow that someone will gaze upon when first entering our home. It ties-in the colors in the matching armchair in the corner of the room to the rug by the coffee table. She sees it as a validation of her sense of style, while I see it as just a comfy place to rest my head while watching Sons of Anarchy.
THE ETERNAL CATFIGHT
Everyone makes snap judgments, sizes up the competition, or at some point, straight-up makes fun of someone else. Itís all part of being human. But thereís sometimes a certain way women do those things, regarding other women, thatís worth noting. You think her make-up is trashy. You donít think she should be wearing open-toed shoes with that dress. You donít think she should be with that guy. I donít even think itís mean spirited, though it certainly is sometimes. I think thereís a weird dynamic that gets handed down from mothers to daughters, a rivalry between sisters, or schoolyard taunting that sets the tone for how women interact with each other throughout life.
Honestly, I donít even know how to best explain it, which is why it can be annoying. Sometimes women will have a strong, startling reaction to another woman (often one of our female friends or co-workers) that seems to just come out of some scary, dark place. Believe me, guys do some of this, but nowhere on the same scale or with the same complexity that comes with having two X chromosomes. Please donít pull us into this drama because we donít know where the line is - or if weíre even allowed to join in and make comments about one of your strange gal pals. We run the risk of suddenly being in trouble for making fun of your friend, even though you did it first.
TALKING, TALKING, AND MORE TALKING
Have you ever been shopping at an airport gift shop and seen one the numerous displays for those special, ďsound occludingĒ headphones? Youíve probably heard of them. Plug Ďem into your iPod, put them on, and through the magic of technology, the headphones detect surrounding noise, filtering it from your range of hearing. My ears do the same thing, but only with my wifeís voice.
Itís not that she even talks too much (she doesnít), or that we have trouble communicating with each other (we donít). Itís just ďGirl TalkĒ. Women tend to express their feelings more openly than men, and sometimes - to many guys Ė it takes the form babbling, if thatís even the right word. Babbling about the dayís events, which we were there to witness, interesting Lucky articles, or some place sheís thinking about shopping this weekend for throw pillows. Itís the stuff that guys will start to mentally filter out unconsciously. I call it ďhalf-listeningĒ. Married guys, you know what Iím talking about. The problem with Ďhalf-listeningíĒ is that it doesnít catch the random important information that youíll throw at us in the middle of talking about something else. You know, like mentioning who will pick up the kid from school tomorrow. That info is somehow mixed into the conversation about how you think we should take more reusable canvas bags to the grocery store. Guys Ė certainly not me- can overuse their half-listening skills, and eventually itíll become Ďone quarter-listeningí and thatís bad news. I think my best advice to women would be this: If you think heís not listening, he probably isnít. If itís something really important, try to gently bring it up again when heís more engaged and also leave a big note on the refrigerator.
I could probably go on with this list, bringing out more ammunition for the never-ending Ďbattle of the sexesí. However, at the end of the day all I want to do is point out a few examples for women that, if handled just a little differently, might have a more positive impact on your relationship. And I definitely know that itís not a one sided affair. My wife is already rattling off her own list to me at this very moment.
Source BY JL Watkins, The GALTime Guy